The first installment sponsored by Mr. Honduras *UPDATED*

TFASNA is kicking off a 6-part series this week entitled, this time last week. In this week long series we'll take a look at what yours truly was doing, well...uh.. this time last week. This first installment is being published a little bit past press time due to airline issues and bedtimes, but without further ado, I present this time last week (last Monday)

Our First Day in Paradise - Roatán, Honduras:

Conversations in Paradise go something like this:
"there's a sailboat."
"yup."

Recipe for true Paradise:

• One part beautiful beach setting with loads of palm trees and ocean breezes
• Two parts local island beer (you gotta go local, it should be international law)
• Three parts - and the secret ingredient to paradise- bacon cheese fries (in HONDURAS can you believe it?)!!!!
• Mix the above ingredients together or enjoy them separately, it doesn't matter you're in Paradise now, mon.
  

Photos of Paradise courtesy of idiot photographers.

This photo illustrates a major problem with asking another tourist to take your photo on a gorgeous roadside stop overlooking lush landscape and panoramic views. BECAUSE I REALLY JUST WANT TO SEE US AND SOME POWER LINES LADY. (PS - I will also blame my traveling companions for this bad photo since they could not accompany us off the boat this day due to some health/boat virus issues.)

Down from the hills overlooking the gorgeous views, aforementioned tourist offers to take our photo again. I gently give her a few instructions this time and, well, you can see this one turned out a little better. ps - giant boat in background is where we are headed back to in the photo and where our traveling friends are camped out while Aimee is fighting a nasty 24 hour bug. In fact, I'm sure Deadlines & Naptimes this time last week memory wouldn't be quite as enjoyable as ours, but she rebounded like the trooper she is and we missed them much this day!

Aaaahhh, beachy beach.

And finally, I bring you "Mr. Honduras"that's what someone called him and it stuck, but he is not in any way shape or form representative of the awesome, gracious locals that actually live in Honduras. See that mom and her two girls? She would not let them turn around at all - can you tell by the look on their faces? Anyway, good ole' Mr. H...yes, he was popular with the locals and tourists alike. ps - you gotta enlarge this photo for full effect

Stay tuned for Part II coming soon....

Come aboard, we're expecting you...

Sorry for the neglect, apparently it IS hard to get ready to leave and pack everything either one of your two babies might possibly even remotely need, I mean like even if there's one one millionth of a chance they might need it, well THAN I HAVE TO PACK IT cause oh my god what if they needed it and didn't have it aaaahhhh then what would they do?! Guilt, much? And, it's not a walk in the park making sure every client/t-shirt needing person has everything they need from me either - well, of course, I guess they can always call, oh yeah, NO ONE if they need something. So, I'm triple protecting every possible thing that might possibly go wrong from every possible angle because it's not easy to fix websites and email campaigns and launched marketing strategies when you are ON A CRUISE WITH LITTLE TO NO COMMUNICATION... gasp....deep breaths, right A-LE?

Anyway, I'm starting to hyperventilate just giving up the time it took write this entry, so until my babies are snug in their beds and/or wreaking havoc playing nicely at Grandma and Grandpa's and I'm hanging out on a balcony somewhere with a Pina Colada in one hand and some kind of communication device in the other, I am out. Love ya!

I'm pretty sure you could safely file me under the "hyper connected" category

I have a few things to say on this topic (what? WHAT?!!) but I am too busy Facebooking my diet coke drinking status and twittering about picking up my kids without a carseat right now, so I'll have to come back to this. In the meantime, enjoy Heather Armstrong and the Cafemom chic talk about "digital moms".

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

And we won't be seeing that mail carrier around these parts again...

Alternate Title - Turkeys really make me want to swear.
Alternate, Alternate Title - The fucking magically disappearing turkey

Consider yourselves warned those of you who may be sensitive to cussing. Okay, I'm going to try and make this short, but in doing so really try to capture a fairly typical Erin situation and the potential insanity that occurred yesterday. I'm pretty sure neither of those two things will happen, but here goes....

Yesterday.
Pulling into my driveway.
The Frames playing in the background (that has nothing to do with this story, but I do like the frames).

I was coming from a good biz meeting, lots of exciting projects/potential business opportunities looming out on the horizon (and I'm not even taking literary licensing here, that thought had actually just flashed through my head) and then there it was, out there on the horizon - well, out there on the 30 foot horizon of my driveway - which happens to be the back of a lot of condos.

*Gasp* - then outloud to myself - Holy Shit - there's a fucking Turkey on the roof. A, really big, mother fucker of a Turkey. I guess seeing a monster huge turkey right at the end of my driveway turned me into an even bigger pottymouth than usual, but shit! that was a big turkey or maybe I've never been that close to one and it was really a very averaged size turkey, but to me that mother fucker looked like a sumo wrestler.

I jumped out of my car, leaving it running (in park at least) grabbed my iPhone and prepared to snap "the turkey shot", @jkrums style (some of you will get that, for those that don't go here). So I may not be on the Today show and Dateline for my shot, but to me it was a shot I was really excited to capture and I couldnt wait to show my parents - more wildlife, very literally, in my own backyard. My parents and I have a long standing joke about the amount of wildlife that graces our house vs. their actual wilderness lakehouse. And here he was the, the pièce de ré·sis·tance, a BIG MOFOing TURKEY. He seemed a happy turkey, just walking along, pecking the shingles (I guess they peck?) hanging out on the roof, then briefly, turning to look at me as if, "oh hey, what's up, miss" (he seemed to think I was younger than I really am - I loved that turkey.)

**Newsflash**Already failed my first objective regarding keeping it short, didn't I?

So, back to the iPhone - I point it at the roof, and although through the glare on my phone screen, I can't actually see what I'm shooting, I'm fairly confident I captured him and am uber excited to send the photo to my mom when I hear the mail truck pull up.

I turn around walking back to grab the mail from her excited to have someone else to witness and cuss along with me, cause OMG, did i tell you there was a sumbitch of a turkey on the roof? I *interrupt her cell phone conversation* (which, whatever mail lady, what if I had a REAL mail question and didn't just want to show you a big fat turkey?!) point to the condos while still looking at her and say something to the *cleaner* effect of, "Look at that monster turkey on the roof there, isn't that crazy?" I see her face look midly interested as she stretches around me to get a peek and then see her expression change to confusion as she says, "Oh, well, he must have flown away or jumped down". OH NO WAY, I turn back around as she's saying this and sure enough there is no GD turkey anywhere - of course, OF COURSE(!!!). "Umm... he was just right there... he he.. I promise he was" I shout to her as she pulls away returning to her phone conversation, surely only seconds away from telling the caller on the other end about the effing crazy ass who just tried to show her a turkey on the roof of some condos in BALLWIN.

To try and wrap this up, even after peering over the neighbor's fence and looking everywhere for Mr. Turkey, I give up, grab my bread co. and head inside to at least review my photographic evidence. I mean Miss Mail Lady may never really talk to me again, but I'm safe in my own sanity, right? Sure. I was. I know what I saw.. that was until, I downloaded this from my phone:

Yup, blow it up, strain your eyes, whatever... you just keep on looking for that turkey cause
YOU AIN'T GONNA FIND ONE in this picture.... ???!!!!!!!

So, in honor of my upcoming admission to a mental hospital for turkey hallucinations, I'll help you visualize what I am pretty sure I did actually see, even if he magically happened to elude proof. Imagine the turkey in this video up on that roof and, see, I'm not the only one who cusses upon finding a turkey near their house:

(ps - this gradually becomes funnier and funnier the more you watch. to the point of imitating the stoner video taper and the turkey as well - whoooooaaaaa dude)

Place your orders now - get your tweepshirt! *UPDATED

I present for your viewing enjoyment - my tweeps in mosiac form. Are you on here? If not, then you are not *gasp* following me on twitter! I wonder how they rank my followers. It's all my real life friends up towards the top (yes, I'm including Starbucks in my list of real-life friends). Then there are a few random people up at the top, too, but how does it know that? I doubt it's a coincidence that my sister in law and @muldrowa are my two first friends and certainly @strongrhetoric and I have our fun share of exchanges in the twitterverse? Of course, then there's some random dude right before @shguckes and my husband, but so the twitterverse is not perfect. Either that or it's trying to tell me something.... Seriously, where does that come from?

* Wait - stop the twesses (like the presses... reaching, i know) - I am an idiot. It shows in the order they followed me. I just couldn't figure that out before since I was sure @mcdelanty was not my first follower. But, then I remembered a LONG time ago before twittering was what all the cool kids were doing, I made her follow me. I remember her bitching about it the whole time, too. But, she was my first. So all of my random stuff above no longer applies. Twitter is no longer trying to tell me anything, thank goodness, my marriage is safe.

Anyway, I'll be making tweepshirts later today. Place your order now. He he he.

Get your twitter mosaic here.

Isn't that suh-weet?! :)